Something for my fans...

1. What cause or condition could you be the poster child for?
Which one couldn't I be the poster child for is more like it!!! I can nicely fit my craziness into any cause or condition- except for maybe penis ailments...

2. Do you know CPR?
Yes- and I've used it!

3. How happy are you in general?
Not much lately- it comes and go. I wish I could get it to stay longer!!!

4. Have you ever been swindled out of money?
Yes, why yes I have.

5. Are you into the whole anime craze?
Nope.

6. Do you have a secret life that few are aware of?
Yes- mum's the word people...

7. Have you ever witnessed or experienced smegma?
I once had a Col. of the USAF stand up for me and call an Air Force Academy Cadet- dick cheese. Does that count?

8. When was the last time you did something illegal?
Walmart- stold some mascara I put in my purse - forgot about it until I was at home and looking for something in my purse.

9. Have you ever had a bad reaction to a medication?
Yes.

10. If you could say one thing to Sarah Palin, what would it be?
Pull my finger! And then I'd knock her glasses off and run out of the room making Daffy Duck noises. WoohooWOoHOO!

Rock-Star Finalist- oh yeah!!!

1. Your personal favorite attack move?
Like Robin- I too read it as attack "movie" disappointed it isn't... attack move- anyone who can work a mean pair of num-chucks (?)- and it's not really an attack move- more of a great defense move- but I love people who can catch knives thrown at them and throw them right back- favorite!!!!

2. What was the last thing you stole?
magnets

3. Have you read about DMT? If so, would you ever try it?
no- don't know about it

4. Why come you got no tattoo?
why come you don't ask questions properly?

5. Which Golden Girl would be the best First Lady and why?
hmmm- it's a toss up between Sophia and Dorothy- maybe they could be a P and VP combo...

6. What would you call an animal that was part unicorn and part cat?
One-eyed One-horned Flying-Purple-People-Eater

7. When's the best time to use the phrase "highly unlikely"?
when asked by a cop if you've been drinking and driving-

8. Your all time favorite comedian?
Love Brett Leake- and Don Rickles

9. Would you rather climb or jump?
Jump!!! Everybody- jump jump...

10. If you had a robot assistant, what would you make it do?
chores- and wake Robin up every morning singing the Name Game- let's do Robin!!!

Oh the fun- good times...

Thought you knew...

**A must see- The Darjeeling Limited!!!

1. Do you know anyone who is morbidly obese?
not particularly morbid- I know people who are fat and happy

2. What are some of the most beautiful songs you have ever heard?
Walt Disney classic movie showtunes

3. Are you generally likeable?
Indeed

4. How often do you feel left behind or forgotten?
Not so much- I tend to do the forgetting

5. Overall, how well do you think your parents did in raising you?
I raised myself

6. Do you think you're weird?
Weirdest!!!

7. Would you ever participate in a new or experimental drug trial?
Yes- depending

8. Do you intimidate people (intentionally or not)?
I think I do- hey, what are you looking at?

9. What are some hurtful or stinging remarks that relatives have made to you?
White trailer trash- born in a bowling alley... need I say more

10. How much emotional baggage do you really carry?
Lots- and it's all carry on- I need to start checking my shit at the gate!

~Bonus Question~What makes you irresistible?
My eyes, smile, perky big toes...

Oh the questions and the answers- how sweet it is!

And here we go...

Mediabistro’s ??? of the week...

1. Do you know anyone employed in the adult entertainment industry?
yes

2. Have you ever dated someone that you felt was out of your league?
no, I am the one who is out of their league

3. What do you really need at this very moment?
a crazy, hysterical, can't stop, fit of laughter in an inappropriate setting

4. After blowing your nose into a tissue, how often do you look to see what you've collected?
only look at what I've collected after a good pick

5. What would be the best thing someone could tell you today?
I've changed my mind

6. Approximately how many times per day do you pee?
just about every hour at work- not so much when I'm at home- 15.25

7. Have you ever had dandruff?
no- maybe- not that anyone has pointed out

8. Are your toenails presently in need of a trim?
sorta'

9. When was the last time you made a racist/sexist remark?
does calling someone Treno-Sticks count?

10. What is the worst physical pain you have ever experienced?
broken nose- when they pulled out all the stuff and stuff that kept my nose set for weeks-

~Bonus Question~Random confession time has visited us once again. Go on and get it off your chest.
WHY????????

Ok folks- them the berries...

Ahhh the questions...

What a boring morning!! Thank goodness for the questions. What a quick pick-me-upper :)

1. Have you ever knowingly used someone to get something you want?
Yes- sorry about it!

2. In your opinion, is there a particular part of the world that produces exceptionally engaging or interesting people?
The Netherlands- such engaging people

3. What is an instant buzz kill for you?
This question!

4. Are there any general assumptions you find have some truth to them?
What goes around, comes around...

5. If you had a personal assistant, what tasks would you delegate to him/her?
Keeping my house clean!!! I hates chores!!! And also, designated driver, yeah- that's the ticket

6. What would your ideal personal assistant look like?
Alfred- me too, good call!

7. Have you ever seriously choked on a piece of food?
No- but I did save Robin's life by Heimlich Manuever

8. What sayings or colloquialisms are unique to your geographic area?
Fuck'em if they can't take a joke

9. Is there the contact information/address of a deceased person in your email address book or cell phone roster?
Not anymore, poor Aunt B hung in there for awhile

10. In what ways are you inept?
Relationships

~Bonus Question~Who; what; when; where; and why?
Who: You
What: stink!
When: this week
Where: everywhere
Why: why not?

Randomski's

1. In what ways are you naughty?
Multiple unknown super undercover smoke breaks

2. What do you continuously find yourself justifying?
Alcohol relaxes your inhibitions

3. Other than you, who know you the best?
Robocop

4. In your opinion, is there a particular part of the world that produces exceptionally odd or strange people?
Northern Europe- strangely tall and big footed, ladies too

5. How spiritually evolved do you think you are?
I think I'm at level 5

6. When was the last time you were awestruck by the attractiveness of a stranger?
Today- not really the attractiveness, but definitely awestruck. I'd like to give a shout out to Andrea at the bridal gown store!!!

7. Do you have a secret bank account or money stash that no one knows about?
Of course, so secret I don't know about it either...

8. In what ways are you a survivor?
Like Reba, "I'm a Survivor"

9. Is there someone that you just don't like, despite your best efforts?
Yes, Robin's secret best friend

10. If you were in a plane that was plummeting to the ground, what would be your final thoughts?
How do I land this sucker safely, and make sure I get Exit Row organized for the fast exit. Plans A, B, and C if needed would be put into place

~Bonus Question~When was the last time you were naked in front of someone other than your partner or spouse?
Completely naked, birth

I am off to bed now. Once again, these are the questions- and those were my answers folks... Keep on keepin' on!!!

Tropical Storm Fay

Bite me!!!

Vintage Photos

In cohoots with Robin and I- and the old photo...

Check out these Vintage Photos- the captions really add to the moment!

http://www.asylum.com/2008/08/05/ye-ol-awkward-family-portraits-indelible-old-timey-photos/?icid=200100397x1207721718x1200399828

Enjoy-

Cheers to the Olympics

Not every Olympic event has been a success. Some, like live pigeon shooting and equestrian high jump, lasted just one year. Here's a look at some other sports no longer in the Olympic program:

Rope climb (1896, 1904, 1924, 1932): Using only their hands, competitors try to see how fast they can get to the top of the rope.

One-hand weightlifting (1896): Similar to the modern snatch event, but athletes were only allowed to use one hand.

Tug-of-war (1900-1920): Two teams of eight try to pull a rope six feet; if neither team reaches the mark after five minutes, the team that pulls the farthest wins.

Standing high jump (1900-1912): Same as the traditional high jump, only without a run-up.
Standing broad jump (1900-1912): The long jump without a run-up.
Standing triple jump (1900-1904): Also known as the hop, step and jump; started from a stationary position.

Underwater swimming (1900): Swimmers were awarded points for how far they went and how long they stayed under water.
Swimming obstacle race (1900): Racers had to swim through the River Seine, climb up and down a pole, then go over and under several boats.

Live pigeon shooting (1900): The birds were released and shooters tried to kill as many as possible.

Equestrian high jump (1900): Riders see who can jump the highest on horseback.
Equestrian long jump (1900): Long jumping on horseback.

Basque pelota (1900): A form of handball played mostly on the border of Spain and France.

Rugby union (1900, 1908-24): One of the most popular team sports in the world still waiting to get back into the Olympics.

56-pound weight throw (1904, 1920): A 56-pound weight affixed with a handle that's thrown over a pole vault bar.
All-around dumbbell contest (1904): Competitors performed 10 different lifts with dumbbells over two days.

Club swinging (1904): Similar to rhythmic gymnastics, only the competitors swing clubs around their bodies.

Plunge diving (1904): From a standing position, divers see how far they can go without taking a stroke.

Duelling pistol (1906): Shooters fired at mannequins wearing frock coats and bull's-eyes on their chests.

Motor boating (1908): Three categories of races in boats; IOC later decided against allowing anything with a motor.

Jeu de paume (1908): Similar to squash, only competitors use their hands instead of a racket to strike the ball.

Plain high diving (1912-24): Divers were not allowed to do any acrobatic moves; they just dove straight into the water.

Tumbling (1932): Athletes do flips and twists along a two-foot-wide strip; now part of the modern gymnastics floor exercise.

Solo synchronized swimming (1984-92): Swimmers were awarded points based on routines synchronized to music.

So- I'm all for adding Tug-of-War back in!!! Good stuff...

Beiläufige Fragen

Well Sir- I'm bored, and just my luck Robin has posted her Random Questions. And here we go...

1. How would the person who likes you the least describe you?
bossy, nosey, controlling, and over the top loud

2. How would the person who loves you the most describe you?
(fill in the blank whomever you are) ___________

3. How would you describe you?
practically perfect in every way

4. What is your favorite song at the moment?
Darth Vader's Imperial March

5. When was the last time you displayed false humility?
when I fake lost a game of pool to my brother- with a wink, a nudge, and a "good game"

6. Do you have any hypochondriac tendencies?
my picking at my eyes, could be borderline hypo

7. Do you have a shit list, and if so, how many people are on it?
why yes I do!!! Right now, about 3 people

8. Have you ever accepted an invitation to an event and then canceled because something better came up?
I've often looked for better things to come up- but end of going to the accepted invitation

9. Do you have any obsessive compulsive traits?
Christmas Tree Decorations

10. Have you ever slept with someone on a first date?
Maybe on Last Call- but not a first date, never

~Bonus Question~Have you ever had a hemorrhoid?
Again, maybe on Last Call... I think that's what his nickname was

Tschüsssssssssssss

My Favorite Aunt...

Hi Nancy!!!

Random Questions of the Week

So - I don't see Robin's Random Thursday Questions of the week, once again- as stated it is my duty to provide the questions when necessary... so here we go!

1. When showering- in what order do you wash and clean yourself, including hair? Were you taught or did you perfect your own strategy??

I am impressed with my 2 minute showers- I start with shampooing my hair and rinse, I put in the conditioner and while it's doing it's magic, I wash from the top of the neck down, ending with my left foot. Then I wash my face- and rinse out my hair and facial soap all at the same moment- and hop out. Proud to say- self taught :)

2. Who is the biggest gossip in your family?

I think it's me, close 2nd is Robs, and Nancy and Heather are at a neck and neck tie.

3. Who is the most influential person in your life right now?

Besides me, and I am very impressed with Robin and her business. She's got smarts beyond belief and inspires me every day to think about what I really want to do- and not be afraid to just do it.

4. Have you ever been constipated, and if so what did you do?

Sadly to say, it's my latest ailment. I ate some apples- somewhere I think I remember hearing about apples and the possibilities- this morning, along with some coffee recommended by others- IT WORKED!!! Feeling much better thank you.

5. What reality TV Show would you want to be on right now?

I would love to get Molly and Peter, and myself on the Dog Whisperer... I just wonder- really wonder, if he could master the walk. I know from every episode, the people all have their doubts, and he proves them wrong and takes over in a matter of minutes turning their pets into well behaved dogs, etc... But, I really do have my doubts how the walk would go with Peter and Molly- it would be so fun to watch and hopefully learn.

6. Do you have a certain word or phrase you always use that you are aware of? If not- ask your friends/ family for the answer...

Mine is the word "All right..." said at the end of conversations when I am ready to leave and get going. I think you all know my voice and exactly how I say it. I was unaware of it, until my "All right" was interrupted by an unsuspecting person of what it means, and the reactions that followed were hillarious- and now aware of it, I do use it all the time. Even my dogs know when I say "All right" that's it- whatever we are doing is over. I even have heard my taped calls at work that are monitored- and I use it with my customers all the time too. Funny.

7. What video game would you challenge your friends to for a $1,000,000 prize. (hmmm- thinking about my own new reality TV show- probably video games from the past... copyrighted people- so you can't steal my idea)

Tetris. Any challengers? And possibly Frogger. Depending on how far we go back. I would love to add Mortal Kombat to my list, but you know who you are- can pretty much always beat me. Oh- and Mario Kart- but then Coley and Toad can do some damage on certain courses.

8. Out of all the people you know- who would you vote for President?

Again me. I think the way I run things is extremely the right way... lol Besides myself, I would vote for - Mom on her good days. She was really genuine, an excellent debater, very thoughtful, very smart, talented, a natural pack leader, great with people of all varieties, and an awesome DJ- Mom's tunes are the best!!!

9. If you were President- what would be you number 1 change? And who would be your VP??

Change- I would really look into the wealth of our nation- and how we could change to make life more affordable for the majority of people, who are working but struggling paycheck to paycheck- not everyone can be a millionaire- so there has got to be a way to make health insurance, housing, a good education, etc... easier on these folks- get back to being able to sustain the way of life- without both parents needing to work full time jobs, being able to spend more time with friends and family and enjoy the Quality of Life- not the quantity and the greed.

VP- probably a shocker to the only person who reads my blog- but right now I would like to put Steve-O-Rino in the position. I like his ideas and think we could come up with some excellent changes- only because I'm in charge, but would really like his input. (Sorry Robs)

10. What is your favorite- cheeseiest- movie of all times?

Flash Gordon people- see it!!! It's so bad, awesomely bad. However, they did get "Queen" to do their soundtrack- interesting...

~Bonus Question~ What is the weirdest game you ever made up to play when you were a child, an original home-made that makes you laugh to this day?

I have a bag full- and they all make me giggle- and I wonder if we (my siblings and I) were to play them now- what the outcomes would be, especially Rocket Rides- I think I could finally get a Rocket Ride from my brother Coley- I was the oldest and always had to give the Rocket Rides- I think Robin tried, but no real luck- I would love to have been them for a day to be the receiver of an awesome Rocket Ride down a flight of stairs... back to the question...

I will go with Bulls. There are 4 of us - and we would compete one on one in the family room on all fours, and fight like bulls, and I think winner took on the next oponent. I wonder though- I don't think I have ever seen bulls fight eachother- so who knows how I came up with the idea. It was fun though. Being the oldest won me many rounds :)

And those are the questions of the week- I hope to see them answered by all!!!

Back in the saddle again...

Ahhh- back in Tampa. What a week. Last Friday, flew to Richmond for a mini-family reunion of sorts, and the only people who read this know exactly how that went. And so, I am in the mood to answer the Thursday questions...

1. When was the last time you lost your dignity?
Hmmm- don't think that I have- yep, it's right here.

2. If you were forced to sing a karaoke song, what would you sing?
"Gold Finger" (Bah Baaaah Bummmm)

3. Do you own any fake or knock-off items that you pass off as the real deal?
Had a Rolex from Asia, bought out of the inside of a jacket, for $10. I thinks it was real...

4. Other than family, who are you most happy to see each day?
Molly Brown and Peter Martin- although Captain Merril Stubing is always a plus, and come to think of it so is The Quiet Man.

5. What have you learned by just hanging back and observing?
To speak up and stop hanging back- get out there people...

6. What item(s) must you buy every week?
Cig's

7. What are you presently on a quest for?
The perfect Sage-ish Green- Ivory White Fairy-Wedding Gown for Mands

8. Do you know any bimbos?
Like, I don't know, like maybe, like like like fur-sure

9. Do you have any true enemies?
Aaron possibly, Amy, (hmmm-maybe people who's names start with A)- Mands- I hope not

10. What do you need to get rid of but just can't bring yourself to part with it?
my Jaguar-

~Bonus Question~Have you ever been alarmed at the smell of your own body?
Yes- I have had some funky-ass breath, I don't think it was natural, and not a smell- but I only get one really-wet-sweaty-stain-marking-armpit. I call it the Army-Hair pit. Quite alarming I say!

Das ist alles! Ciao Leute!

Peter Martin poops in secret...

I never see him poop anymore- and he doesn't go in the house, so it is quite a mystery. Not sure what is going on. Molly on the other hand, has unbelievable poop control. She can stop mid-poop to keep Peter Martin from stealing her soccer ball, recover said ball, and move to another corner of the yard- and finish. Wow. I can't do that, but then again, I've never had to defend anything mid-poop. Curious, says I.

So- as you might have noticed, random Thursday questions were not posted this week. Another mystery. Possibly Janet was mid-poop, and could not stop- so decided to for-go the questions and continue about her business. I accept the challenge, being Janet's number 2- and will post this week's random questions.

1. Can you walk by a mirror, window, what have you- and not look at your reflection to check yourself out?
No, I cannot. I don't know if it's obsessive or not- but I always got to check my shit out.

2. Do you pick or blow your nose?
I cannot successfully blow my nose- it is not a talent I possess, so toilet paper in hand, I do the former. Disgusting, but these are the random questions people.

3. Do you possess the "spitting" talent?
This is something I cannot do as well. I can spit my gum out like a baseball player, pretty far too- but normal spit- I got nothing. Except maybe some left over drool by the attempt.

4. What is something you ate regularly as a kid, but no longer eat?
Bologna sandwiches. It went out when my mom stopped making my lunches. I see you can still purchase Bologna, so people- probably unfortunate kids, are still eating it. But do adults? I say no way jose.

5. Why did the deaf blonde sit on the newspaper?
Answer to follow to those who leave comments- I want to know what you think may be the answer.

6. Fundraisers, do you think all the money raised really goes to the cause?
I hope so- my sister and I received an award for most money raised for Big Brothers Big Sisters of Tampa this week. And then we bowled. (oooh, interesting word bowled- fits right in there with my toilet humor this morning)

7. What is your highest bowling score?
recently 188, overall, 277.

8. Thoughts about manners, are they necessary or are they for conformists?
I believe they are necessary, and that you are not a conformist if you have good manners. It's a lost art that I wish more people took notice of.

9. Now a days, are there really "accidental" pregnancies?
I say in rare occasions yes, like people who have their tubes tied, and thought they were good to go, but for whatever reason became pregnant. Other than that- nope.

10. Out of the 20 people you know personally, and you were on Survivor- who would be the first to be voted off? and who would you keep till the end??
Off the island- Aaron, former co-worker- or possibly Steve Holmes for those of you who know comedy. Keepers- Bandersnatch. She's good people, and I'm oldest- enough said.

~Bonus Question~ Please list your 6 favorite numbers, 1-59- I'm playing lotto this week. Those of you who are curious about my 6 favorite numbers, well they are 1, 25, 8, 12, 23, 22, and 35.

Thanks for playing. I'm looking forward to this upcoming weekend in Richmond. Any bad vibes??

K-Rock City is out!

Mandross

is that you???

Hi...

...Robin!

Does Anbody Read This?

I think only Robin reads my blog. Hmmmpf. However, I have decided to answer the Thursday specials...

1. What do you miss the most about your childhood?
My family- the military life- Glamour Girls Cruise Ship

2. How many books would you estimate you own?
None-ya

3. Do you know any true visionaries?
yes- and if you all reading this know me- than you too know somebody

4. Who is the neediest person you know?
Peter Martin it is

5. What is your nighttime routine before tucking into bed?
Let the dogs out- turn off the lights- turn down the covers- and sleep

6. Last week Bleak found someone's head. What's the most disgusting thing you've ever found?
(Just so you guys know, "Bleak" didn't find anyone's head. It was a joke gone horribly wrong.)
a dead rat in my yard

7. What scents or odors do you associate with bad memories?
the stale alcohol on the breath smell

8. Have you ever flirted with a teacher or professor to get better grades?
to get better grades-no. to flirt- yes

9. Have you ever been sued?
No. So sue me!

10. Do you have an unrequited love?
?

~Bonus Question~What has the past year been like for you?
Fast and furious

It's Saturday Morning...

Guten Morgan alle!!!

So, I have so become a morning person now. Who knew? I worked nothing but night jobs up until my latest job, and now I cannot sleep in past 7am. Kind of annoying. But then again, I do not think I would want to go back to working nights and the bar scene. The kind of jobs you sleep all day- wake up, go to work, and stay up until the sun starts to rise. Now I am amazed if I make it past midnight. It's a fete of strengths.

Still don't know about my car troubles. Car seems to be running fine- but the annoying check engine light will not go away. So it be.

I am trying to raise money for Big Brothers Big Sisters of Tampa. My team and I are bowling for Kid's Sake on July 11th and need to raise $1000 minimum. If you are reading this blog- and are interested in donating- please leave a comment. It's for a great cause- and you can check out their website to see how much good your donation means!!!

So there it is this fine- thunderstorming morning. I hope someone can help.

Must See

Check out the Photo Bombers link. It is laugh out loud funny!!!

Holy Moly

Electric Bill this month $171.93

OUCH!!!

A bad omen or what?

S8N

Intersting isn't it. I have been playing old school SuperNintendo Tetris- and S8N is my password to get to the level I have saved on the game. I thought nothing of it- wrote it on my whiteboard so I wouldn't forget, until today when Butt Scratcha Bandersnatch saw it for what it is. I wonder if the people at Nintendo know- and giggle- or if they are like me- and clueless. Weird.

Your thoughts?

And the blog-telethon continues...

Some great questions found on another blog I think we should all answer.

1. How often per day do you feel ugly?
when I have the "morning face"

2. Have you ever sucked the toes of another person?
oh hell no

3. Have you ever witnessed "what goes around comes around" in action?
yes- and it ain't pretty

4. In what ways are you parsimonious?
in the only ways I know how- and perhaps I am not in any way

5. Are there any parts of your body that you are ashamed of?
yes- my leader toe- he's out of control that one

6. Was there a teacher or professor that changed your life?
Meine Deutschen Professoren

7. What is the most ironic thing that has happened to you recently?
wouldn't you believe- this morning, I woke up BEFORE my alarm went off- ironic eh

8. Has someone ever saved your life, either figuratively or literally?
Jackson Memorial Hospital Circa 1990

9. What is your biggest time waster?
Super Nintendo Mario Allstars and Super Mario World people!!!

10. At this moment, how many people are you mad at?
I'm a little po'd at everyone and no one at the same time- is it my moodiness- or others? OTHERS!!!

~Bonus Question~Do you ever blow your nose while in the shower?
No time- my showers are a military- under one minute mission.

And so my blog will continue- as will my car troubles, snot rockets in flight, and the all the rest of the mother jazz that happens day to day. And again, like a dear dear friend of mine who likes to add a little something something to her- or his- blog... It's Best Part Worst Part of the day...

Best Part- Visiting with my nosey neighbors- they are a hoot!

Worst Part- Did you see my earlier response- Car troubles- I have them- I hates them- and that is all.

Who It Is has left the building- Good Night!

Snot Rockets in Flight-

Hmmmpf!!! Car troubles. I hates it!!!

Who it is

Well hello. This is my first time. But because of others who have posted blogs- I too feel compelled to write something. Something. That's better.

Until next time...